Headcannons and Pancakes
by ChocoMaize
Summary: Headcannon: Human Form!Arceus can't cook. Basically, a fic based off an old headcannon of mine. And likewise, the three main characters are humanized or something.


_A/N: Arceus and Palkia are girls, and Giratina is a dude. Implied Godmodeshipping(Giratina/Arceus) but it's not that obvious. _

_Also Palkia bought a small apartment while she lived down there for a month. idk how she paid the rent tho. Or got the money to buy it. _

_Enjoy!_

* * *

Okay.

You're one hundred percent sure that cooking is easy. Yup.

...

Your name is Arceus and it's been a day since you got yourself this neat human form.

You're looking at this box of "pancake" mix and looking from the advertisements you've seen about this brand or whatever, it's pretty popular with the humans nowadays.

Palkia's setting up the stove for you, since she seems to have experienced cooking and other human necessities as she lived a human life for what, 1 month? You remember all the bullshit that happened while she was gone.

You should have gotten a replacement while she was gone, though.

But that is history and now she's taking out two eggs, a bowl, and a spoon.

You look at those eggs suspiciously.

"Palkia,"

She turns around to face you,

"What?" She asks.

You ask her,

"Why do we need these eggs?"

She shrugs. "I dunno, but cooking this without the eggs makes it look and taste like crap. "

She comes back to the table with a cup of water in hand.

She puts the mix in the bowl, cracks the eggs, also put in the bowl, and pours the water in the bowl.

She tells you to mix it with the spoon until it's devoid of any lumps and you start mixing.

Giratina walks in the kitchenette and gets a bottle of soda from the fridge.

He looks at the bowl you're holding.

"Arceus, have mercy on that bowl."

You look up and give him a confused look.

He rolls his eyes.

"I'm sure that this thing you're mixing is a smooth as velvet now. Didn't you notice?"

You mouth "Wha?" and then look down at the bowl.

It DOES look smooth.

He "tsks" and continues to raid the fridge.

Boy does he love soda pop.

You brush the sliver locks of hair away from your face when you notice that they're falling over your eyes again.

You pull the headband off, since it isn't doing any justice to your somewhat long bangs and set it on the table.

"Hey Palkia! The mix is ready!"

You hear Giratina mumble "It's called batter, miss I-know-everything".

You hit his golden hair with the headband. He does nothing but stand up, and go back to his place on the sofa.

Palkia wa already at your side when you turned around, and she opened the stove again.

She gets a frying pan and puts some butter on it.

You'd like to ask what the butter was for, but eh, you're too busy looking at Palkia pouring some of the batter on the pan.

You watch as she flips it over, and as she puts it on a plate.

She then pours more batter, flip it over after a while, puts it on the same plate, and repeat.

"Hey Palkia,"

"Hm?"

"Can I try?"

She looks at you and then says,

"Sure! Just don't burn yourself in the process. "

You roll your eyes.

"C'mon, Palkia, I'm a god for heaven's sake. I'm sure I'm careful enough not to burn myself. "

She laughs, but she does give you the spatula.

"Here, just flip it like before when it turns sort of brown. Then wait a for a while and then put it on the plate, just like this."

She puts the finished pancake on the plate, (there's eight pancakes on it) and then pours some batter on the pan again.

You do flip it when it turns brown, but you got distracted and move your focus on the TV.

They're showing this show where various pokemon showcase their various talents and stuff. You watch it for a while.

You can smell something on fire.

Giratina's woken up from his short nap and looks at you - no, BEHIND you in horror.

You quickly turn around and see the once creamy batter on fire.

You turn on the tap and get fill the cup with water as Giratina rushes to turn off the stove.

You douse the small flame with water and cover your nose as smoke fills the room.

You remember that Palkia went out not long ago and you thank god (yourself?) that she wasn't here to give you a lecture of your lifetime.

Giratina looks at you as if you burned his "precious" golden locks he likes so much.

You smile at him nervously and look at the frying pan.

The "pancake" is nothing more than a piece of black, charred, whatever and you throw it in the trash can.

You feel kinda sad, but hey, there's still the untouched pancakes on the table.

You get yourself a plate and 2 pieces of pancakes.

Giratina does the same.

You take a bite of it and damn, it really tastes good.

Now you feel bad for burning the pancake you were supposed to cook.

Giratina must have noticed you staring blankly at your food, since he's poking your head continuously.

"Hey, hey, wake up. "

You slap his hand away.

"What?"

"Why are you looking at those pancakes like that? S'not like they just died or something."

"Giratina why do you care about inanimate objects so much? They don't have feelings, you know. "

He deadpans, "Oh no, you're hurting Mr. Plate's feelings! Even after all the effort he took to keep your food from falling and all that jazz."

You laugh a bit and he smiles.

"That's better, " He says.

You two have idle chitchat as Palkia entered the apartment.

You can hear her sniffing a bit.

"Guys, why do I smell smoke?"

Giratina looks at you and smirks as you explain to Palkia what happened.

She did give you a lecture.

Giratina laughs at you afterwards, and you hit him with the plastic fork.

He sticks his tongue out at you in a childish manner, and he goes back I eating the pancakes. You do too.


End file.
